The Wayward Law

Every good scientific theory is grounded in a question. Usually, the question stems from some strange quality of life, of nature, of the world. The question I pose here is this: where do all the ridiculously hot Danish girls go during the cold-weather months? It would seem, if you have happened to be in Copenhagen during most of the year, that the population of gorgeous women goes drastically down when the temperature gets too low. A scholar of much renown (actually, just a fellow law school student) has a theory as to where they go.

Africa. It might sound crazy, but the theory is that when the temperature in Copenhagen breaks below 12 degrees centigrade, a nondescript ferry in the harbor is loaded with most of the hot girls in Copenhagen, and they are sent off to a remote island off the coast of Africa. After the spring thaw, when the temperature breaks above 12 degrees, a phonecall on a closed-circuit, encrypted network is placed to a camp where the girls have been sent to spend their days working out, starving themselves, and lying in the sun. This phone call is to inform the management to send the ferry back.

Then, all of the girls are loaded onto the ferry with their blue bikes and white skirts. By the time the summer ferry arrives, the temperature has reached ideal blue-bike-riding-in-white-skirt temperature. The ferry always arrives at midnight, after which the cargo is unloaded, and the girls go riding from the harbor on the bikes, so that all of the boys in Copenhagen wake up on a beautiful, Danish summer day to find hotties, in white skirts, on blue bikes, riding through the city. I never said it was a good theory.

In other news, Copenhagen now has a Ben and Jerrys! It’s a beautiful thing.